This has been a very interesting year.  I left a marriage that wasn’t working for anyone, and threw my hat, very heavily, into the ring of entrepreneurialism.  Things had not been financially secure for my family since the bubble burst in 2008 and a crumbling infrastructure could no longer even pretend to be a safe place – financially, emotionally, or physically.  This was one of the scariest situations I have ever dealt with, but I knew that we all had to get out.

My first instinct was to get a job, which I did, very easily.  However, it was in no way the right job for me.  Half of the time I didn’t even know what my coworkers were talking about, what their values were.  It was a sales position – something I’m very comfortable with, but I didn’t believe in what I was selling, I didn’t feel that it would benefit 85% of the people that I was trying to sell to and I just will not compromise my integrity by talking someone into something that I do not believe will benefit them.  I felt that the company I was selling for had a severely tarnished reputation and the more I tried to fit it into my scope of what’s right, the more I knew I needed to leave.

I did, however – really learn about what I’m willing to do and what I’m not.  I’ve owned quite a few businesses, some super successful, some not. I’ve worked for lots of very different companies with ideas and values that vary quite a bit and at this point, I’m willing to state what is and what isn’t ok with me.

Does the Universe Really Want Me to Experience Abundance?

As I came to the decision that my life’s purpose is really to work for myself, in an effort to be of service to women who are in similar circumstances, I had to become very clear about what I believed. Do I believe that the Universe conspires to bring me exactly what I ask for?  Or do I not? I’d been talking the talk, could I walk the walk? Was I able to confront my biggest fears, believe that if I followed the path laid out before me, and lived my life’s purpose, that my needs would be met?  To be honest, I didn’t know.  But I was determined to find out.

Having no one else to rely upon, I started to really experiment with my offerings.  I made a list of things that I already do for compensation, then I added things I could do for compensation, then I added things I would do for free. Next, I started to really brainstorm how I might receive compensation for the things that I would do, even if no one paid me to do them.  When I was done, I had a multi page (multi multi) list of ideas, jumping off spots, and possibilities.

One of my biggest take aways from that session was that I had a secret belief that I couldn’t be all of the things that I was.  At least not in one space. Over the years, I had created no less than four websites for my offerings.  I was very careful to keep them separate and in this session, I came to the realization that all the things that I did were related.  At least for a certain demographic. I’m a web developer/social media consultant with a passion for exploring spirit, a love and a talent for intuitive readings, and the ability to help people uncover what it is that makes their heart soar and the steps they need to take to make that their life’s work. I am a creative artist and I love to help others unleash their creative artist.

*Whew – that’s a whole lot of self esteem right there – how dare I claim that? 

But, you know what?  I finally came to terms with the idea and have come to truly believe, ‘how dare I not claim that?’

We’re all here with unique gifts and talents and if we keep them to ourselves, hidden under the bed, how does that serve anyone? It doesn’t.

As I continue to live that truth and to truly believe (it’s a process!) that the Universe will conspire to being me everything I desire, it continues to be true.  And in being true, I’m able to trust more and more.  Yes, it’s a leap of faith – yes, sometimes it’s really scary, and most importantly, yes – you must do the work. However, part of that work is to treat yourself like the unique, beautiful being that you are.

Reward yourself. It doesn’t have to be something that breaks the bank… Take a long, bubbly bath. Take the afternoon off and head off into the forest, or the beach, or someplace where you can take your shoes off and plunge them into the Earth. Splurge on one piece of expensive chocolate.  Take yourself to an expensive restaurant (go for lunch, or happy hour, there are always specials).  I don’t care what you do, just do something.  Shift your consciousness from scarcity to abundance.  Work on it every day.

Tell me:

What will you do today to shift that mindset?